Returning home after living abroad for over three years was an overwhelming and thought provoking experience.

I knew before I left Vietnam for the 33 hour journey to get home, that it would be an intense experience full of reflection. I also knew that it would be my first chance since moving to Vietnam to evaluate my experience in Vietnam, from outside of Vietnam.

Seeing family, friends, and being the best man in a wedding were all remarkable memories made during the trip that I will cherish forever, and constant reminders of the fact that my life is now in Vietnam.

Chowing down on a classic American hot dog

It had been such a long time since I'd visited home that after greeting my family, food was one of the first orders of business once I touched down on U.S. soil. After the various articles that I've written raving about Vietnamese cuisine, people were plenty eager to remind me of the magnificent dishes from my motherland just to make sure I hadn't forgotten. I informed my friends and family ahead of time that I was on a mission to eat some of my absolute favorite and most-missed dishes all day, every day.

There was the visiting of old landmarks, the reminiscing, the hugs, the joy, the laughter and the shock that one would expect.

There was driving my old car down the wide roads filled with a different kind of traffic than you see in Vietnam's clustered streets. I accidentally honked my horn at a time that was inappropriate by western standards, surprising my passengers and resulting in glares from other drivers, a reminder that I had indeed had been in Asia for a long time.

There was playing my dad's old vinyl albums from the late sixties and early seventies. There was visiting the mountain hot springs with my sisters. There was my step-mom's cooking.

There was a lot of catching up to do and not enough time to do it. There were the changes I had anticipated; the landscape had changed, development had taken away more empty spaces, people had changed, their situations had changed, and the inevitable process of aging was more noticeable than ever after such a long absence.

At the same time, there were many things that were the same. Picking up right where I left off with old friends, the fresh mountain air, my Dad cooking breakfast on Sunday mornings and my sisters and I still fighting and loving one another at the same time. The bombardment of advertisements were still there. The city lights and sporting events were there and the political squabbling was still on the news.

There were also the questions. Typical questions about whether or not I had a girlfriend, what I was doing for work, how I liked my job, what life is like in Asia, what I was doing next, etc.

Then, there were other, more serious questions, most of which were specifically about Vietnam: Were they angry at Americans? Do they hate us? Is it safe? Is it clean? What is it like to live in a communist country? Am I in danger? What is the crime like? Are there secret P.O.W. (prisoner of war) camps in the jungle? Is there a heavy military presence? What are the people like? Do they still wear those hats? What is the heat like? Do you ever feel scared?

Without a doubt, most people were curious about the war and how it had effected Vietnam. People have a certain fascination about Vietnam in the States and I suppose people in Vietnam have a certain fascination about the States as well.

It is impossible to fully answer all the questions without first addressing the misconceptions many have about Vietnam in the U.S. and vice-versa. It is also important to acknowledge that the majority of people whom I know, without a shadow of a doubt, believe that the U.S. never belonged on Vietnam's soil, nor should have been involved in a war here to begin with.

It is understandable that what these two nations know about each other is greatly influenced by the war, by what was written and reported of the war, stories handed down about the war, the results of the war and by what they have been shown or learned about the war. It is also important to understand that both countries are vastly different than they were during the war.

Hollywood paints a picture of America that has caused people to ask me during my travels how many guns I own, the answer to which is zero, and this is sometimes a shocking disappointment to the person who asks. People wonder if we all have the dream lives falsely showcased on MTV. Many think you cannot walk down the street in the U.S. without being robbed or shot. Some people think that there is no poverty in the U.S. and that we all drive humongous cars and live in mansions. There is the historical footage of assassination's of JFK and his brother during the era (which neither nation can imagine, had that not happened, how different the histories of both countries might be).

Haunting image of the self-immolation of monk Thich Quang Duc.

People in the U.S. have grown up watching numerous war movies about Vietnam. There is the famous image of the Buddhist monk Thich Quang Duc, lighting himself on fire in the streets of Saigon. They have seen classic protest and war footage from that era. They have grown up hearing about Woodstock, the anti-war movement, and how the war had forever changed America. They have heard the music from the time, much of which was also directly influenced by the war. They have images of John Lennon, Neil Young, and Bob Dylan asking for peace in their heads. There used to be black "P.O.W. - M.I.A." (Prisoner of War/Missing in Action) flags hanging at many public schools when I was growing up, a reminder of how many people disappeared during the war.

People in both countries have images and ideas of each other that are neither entirely accurate, nor entirely inaccurate; they are the culmination of many things, actions and years.

There are also the facts; there was a war and it cost both sides dearly. There were ideological differences and the paranoia of the "Cold War". There is the devastation that a war leaves behind long after it's over, which include causalities, landmines, chemical side effects and years of tension. There are famous leaders from both countries. Nixon (although Kennedy and Johnson initially sent people to the region) and Ho Chi Minh. One is the hero and father of a country, the other, remembered by many as a criminal, forced to shamefully resign from the Presidency.

Since those days, a lot has changed. Trade has since opened up, tourism increased, forgiveness has come for many, and there seems to be entire generations from both sides that are simply moving forward and don't even think about the war. People in neither country, from my experience, hold a grudge about the war anymore.

I spent about 18 hours on one of my flights returning to Vietnam and I continued to reflect. The man sitting next to me had been stationed in Vietnam during the conflict. He was my father's age and served in the Navy, never touching the shore. For him too, it was time to move on. He never understood the war as most soldiers don't understand war. They are just taking orders. He listened to me intently as I tried to answer his questions about Vietnam. He also smiled in bewilderment that in his lifetime, a young man such as myself, would be happily living in Northern Vietnam as a journalist. He simply shook his head and said, "The Vietnamese people are amazing, what magnificent people."

All the questions people have cannot be answered with only an explanation. Some things, you simply have to see. However, what I realized through all the reflection and my trip back to the U.S., is that we aren't all that different. Whether it be the government or the people, things are more similar than people in either respective country might think. Sure, there are immense differences that only visiting both countries could reveal and there are two completely different cultures, but in the end, it all sort of reminded me of a saying made famous in Thailand: "Same same but different."

I guess, that's how I would explain it best, to people from both places, things in both countries are the same but different. At the end of the day, we are all just people trying to get by. Being home made me realize that I'm blessed to have two homes and both, for their own reasons, are incredible places.

John Lennon is synonymous with the peace and anti-war movements